I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
We left an ass print on the piano.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
