doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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