I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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