guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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