rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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