Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
