you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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