this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Are we still banned from the library?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize