I'm gonna have a badass scar
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize