i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
My vagina is officially offended.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
