just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Brb crying the tears of my youth
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
