What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
