Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
