Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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