I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
what the fuck happened to the tacos
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
