I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
