just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
