I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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