i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I can't turn off my feet"
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
