hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Two words: blizzard sex
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
