R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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