You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
She even gives head with a lisp.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
