I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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