the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
