You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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