My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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