found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
