The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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