what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize