Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
The power of my boobs compel you
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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