Can Purell be used as lube?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I AM VODKA MAN
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Randomize