its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize