She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
