First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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