How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
