So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I can't turn off my feet"
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
