i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
