There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
