so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
They took my balls.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
