my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
