i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
