Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
