Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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