Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
