He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize