I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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