We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
