everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
