I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize