I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Dick very happy bro
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
