Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
